Visualisation is more than a just pretty picture

Jo had previously failed her Stage 3 Riding exam, despite having been told she was well above standard. She was therefore very anxious about retaking the exam, to the extent that, as the day got closer, she just spent her time worrying about what might happen. In her mind she was imagining making all sorts of mistakes and just freezing up so that the whole day would descend into a complete disaster…. That sort of thinking feeds a self fulfilling prophecy. As one of her riding coaches I knew how important the exam was to her.

We had a session where she visualised the exam day. Having already been up to the exam centre for a lesson, she could imagine the layout, and having been through the exam she knew the format of the day. We started by setting up an ‘anchor’ for staying calm and confident, so that she could have this resourceful feeling at any point she needed it.

Rather than just imagining a perfect exam, I then asked Jo to imagine the sorts of things that would she would do, building in the importance of checking stirrup leathers, noting what tack the horse was wearing, looking around at other candidates when riding in open order, listening attentively to the instructions given, and relating to the horse in a sensitive way. All of these details were important.

Then we added in the sorts of little errors that could happen, like striking off on the wrong leg or refusing a fence. We visualised how she would cope with them: what she would do to correct it, then how she would stay calm and unflustered and what she would say to the examiner afterwards.

Then we imagined what it was like to be the examiner, stepping into their shoes and seeing it from their perspective. Jo found this very surprising: they actually wanted to pass the candidates, they were not ogres at all!!

We ran through the visualisation as if we were watching a movie a few times, with Jo noticing where she needed to improve it and then discussing what she would do differently. Then she ‘stepped in the movie’, imagining it actually happening to her step by step.

As I saw her happy relaxed expression and confident stance I knew she would pass. She did more than that, getting a pass plus and she was thrilled!

As Jo explains : ” Rationally, I found it easy to visualize passing, but found it difficult to actually believe it deep down. It was only when we ran through the visualization of the whole exam, slowed down with all the detail that I could believe it. Then I felt calm and confident and that I could sort out anything that went wrong on the day.”

She reflected “I realised that I had been fooling myself that everything was alright, yet I needed to face a deep rooted problem of exam nerves and deal with it. And it was a fun way of sorting it out- Liz made me laugh as we worked it out and in the end I really enjoyed the exam.”

As her story illustrates, our approach to Visualisation is much more than positive images, or saying unrealistic affirmations to yourself. When effectively coached, you can go back to your best performance time after time, and add in how to get even better.

 

Paying someone to ride your horse?

One day, you notice that your work-life balance has gone AWOL….  Karen now runs her own livery and training yard and explains how coaching with Liz helped her:

 “.. Previously I used to work teaching IT, which I loathed. To add insult to injury, I ended up paying someone else to ride my horses, which is why I was working in the first place!  So I had taken the decision to stop working to concentrate on the horses and teach at local riding schools part time. However, it wasn’t adding up financially. It was so frustrating and I was losing my confidence that I could make a go of it…”

One of the biggest impacts of coaching was to really push her teaching business to a clear target group.  By setting goals that played to her strengths, Karen became determined that this was what she wanted to do:

“…Before I only had 1-2 lessons to teach a week, now I am kept busy with teaching and running my yard, and I am able to afford to keep my horses, have training, and improve the yard to really build the business….”

“..Looking back I was not focused on getting pupils and giving lessons, I kept looking at different options to make ends meet. I was able to pin down what I really wanted, so now I stick to one path and do it properly. I have advertised and feel more confident because I believe I can help these pupils, before I didn’t really have that confidence. I’ve stuck to it and talked to everyone I know about it and am very positive.

A great example of how ‘knowing what you want – what you really, really want’ – is the key to effective goal setting…!

Playing with your mind

Even the smallest fence would look like a huge brick wall to Mel….. it was certainly not jumpable. On one hand she wanted to jump, but with her mind playing tricks on her, she would just panic and pull up the horse. Mel loved working with horses and wanted to take her British Horse Society exams with a view to becoming a professional coach.

She came to me to see whether NLP  coaching could help on a one to one session. We started with Mel describing the imaginary fence, and went into some detail about how high it was and the colour of the bricks. This was to help her understand her visual imagination. We made it higher and wider and then put it back to its original size – this was tough for Mel and she genuinely looked and felt a bit queasy at times.  As her coach I had to be quick to calibrate how to loosen up this ‘stuck’ thinking and keep her mind moving. I also worked with her beliefs about jumping and helped her review her thinking about how to jump effectively.

I asked Mel to look more closely at her imaginary fence and she realised that in fact the bricks were so perfect in their repeating pattern that they had to be wallpaper. With the earlier stretching of the jump to being bigger and wider, she had brought the image to conscious attention and therefore in her control. So what would she do with the wall now? We considered whether she should just burn it down, jump through it like the police horse demonstrations or trample it down or whatever. She decided that she would dowse it with water until it became a soggy mass!

The mind can be wonderfully quick at making changes..

With the jump dissolved, she was able to think about jumping in a really positive manner and happily booked a lesson with her own instructor.  She rang  to say how well the lesson had gone, how the old brick wall had never even appeared and how much she had enjoyed being able to jump again. A few weeks later she passed her Stage 2 and several months later  passed her Stage 3 – she was well on track for her goal again.